The Simpsons Quotes (Page 82)
Lisa: Let's see Bass, Bass. "Tiny Tim" "The Chipmunk's Greatest Hits" "A Castrati Christmass"? UGH!!
Barry White: (singing) Can't get enough of your love, babe... (Bart & Lisa supprised & rush to the door)
Lisa: Mr. White, can we borrow you for a minute?
Barry White: Anything for a lady.
Barney: TAKE THAT SNAKE!! (hits ground) AND YOU TOO!! (hits ground again) SNAKES!! SNAKES EVERYWHERE!!!!
Lenny: Hey, ya getting ready for Whacking Day?
Barney: What's Whacking Day?
Lisa: Dad, everyone likes Whacking Day, but I hate it! Is there something wrong with me?
Homer: Yes, honey.
Lisa: Then what should I do?
Homer: Just squeeze your anger into a ball, and release it at the right moment! Like that one time I hit the referee with the whiskey bottle remember that?
Lisa: Yeah...
Homer: When daddy hit the referee?
Lisa: Yeah...
Homer: Yeah...
Lisa: (to Grampa) So, we wrote the cartoon, put your name on it and sent it in.
Bart: Didn't you wonder why you were getting checks for not doing anything?
Grampa: I figured, cause the Democrats were in power again.
Bart: (to Grampa Simpson) We need to know your first name.
Grampa: Auuuugghh! You're making my tombstone!
Lisa: No, Grampa, we'd just like to know your name.
Grampa: Well, whenever I get confused, I just look at my underwear. (whips off underwear without removing pants) My name is...Abraham J. Simpson!
Lisa: (amazed) Grampa...how did you take off your underwear without taking off your pants?
Grampa: (confused) I...don't...know!
Lisa: I know! We'll write our own episode of 'Itchy and Scratchy'!
Bart: (confused) Cartoons have writers?
Lisa: Eh, sort of.
Krusty: (after viewing the bad Itchy & Scratchy episode) Eh, I could pull a better cartoon out of my a...hey-hey-hey-hey! Whoa! Wasn't that great, kids?
• Vote for this Quote! • July 17th, 2007 Mr. Burns: This is a thousand monkeys working at a thousand typewriters. Soon, they'll have written the greatest novel known to mankind. (reads one of the typewriters) "It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times?!" You stupid monkey!
[The monkey screeches]
Mr. Burns: Oh, shut up.
Mr. Burns: Simpson, eh! New man?
Smithers: He thwarted your campaign for governor; you ran over his son; he saved the plant from meltdown; his wife painted you in the nude...
Mr. Burns: Doesn't ring a bell...
Mr Burns: Look at them all in the darkness I'm bringing, they're not sad at all, they're actually singing! [grabs Smithers by the shoulders] They sing without juicers. [pauses] They sing without blenders. [pauses] They sing without flunjers, capdabblers and smendlers!
• Rating 4.0 / 5 • Vote for this Quote! • July 17th, 2007