Tom Tucker: Today, we'll see some of Quahog's finest athletes struggle valiantly against God's twisted designs. You'll cheer, you'll cry, you might even get a cheap laugh or two.
Diane Simmons: I know I will, Tom. In fact, there's the distinct possibility that by the end of the day we'll all be going to Hell.
Tom Tucker: I'll see you there, Diane.
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Show: Family Guy
Episode: Ready, Willing and Disabled
Characters: Tom Tucker, Diane Simmons
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