Government Agent: What are these?
Uncle Junior: A watch an' a pencil.
Government Agent: Repeat the following sentence, "No ifs, ands or buts."
Uncle Junior: I'll do it if I f**kin' feel like it. Take your ultimatums and stick 'em in your ass.
Government Agent: No...repeat the sentence.
Uncle Junior: What is this person talkin' about?!
Perry Benedek: These people are trying to establish for the government, that if you shot Anthony Soprano, which we're not conceding, that it certainly wasn't intentional. That you were confused and disoriented.
Government Agent: Don't coach him, please.
Uncle Junior: My nephew Anthony?!
Perry Benedek: That's why you're here in custody.
Uncle Junior: Where's Mel?
Perry Benedek: You dismissed Mr. Melvoin as your attorney and hired me, because of his paralyzed hand from his stroke, it made you nervous.
Uncle Junior: If somebody shot my nephew, it was him himself. He's a depression case.
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Show: The Sopranos
Episode: Join the Club
Character: Uncle Junior
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